para o m.

que nem costumo dar o endereço deste lugar, mas foi troca por troca e um reconhecimento curioso. as pessoas das palavras são sempre perigosas porque pegam nas nossas e as cozinham de outro modo, com novas combinações e invenções. quem sabe onde vão parar o marujo, as mãos e a gentileza.

gosto de Matosinhos e da rua principal. as casas são sui generis e o ambiente também. o junto ao mar já é outra coisa, com os passeios largos e os apartamentos de enormes varandas. nas ruas interiores passeia quem não se ausenta durante a semana. a recente transformação do mercado atrai alguns turistas, esta gente que se espalha agora por toda a parte como uma erva daninha, dizem uns. ninguém gostava, ninguém recuperava. quando os outros querem, todos querem também. não é novo. gosto de forasteiros.

noutra ocasião e à saída do mesmo porto estavam dois asiáticos que julguei na altura serem filipinos. precisaram de mostrar uma batelada de papéis e autorizações para sair da zona portuária, talvez mais para entrar se calhasse mudar o turno do securitas de serviço. depois de muita conversa de surdos, e de um receio latente que lhes senti, diluíram-se como eu nas ruas de Matosinhos a olhar para as montras e a falar, embora pouco, entre si. naquele momento, o da dissolução, tinham desaparecido, como se costuma dizer, por entre a multidão embora não existisse multidão. esse é o efeito dos navios nos marujos. sobem a escada do portaló e logo adquirem uma identidade única, um lugar de origem, manias e famílias, necessidades, preferências e manias. alcunhas. sair desse lugar ao mesmo tempo desabrigado e fechado implica perdas imprevistas. um dia revejo o Conrad deste ponto de vista, mas não precisaria de ir mais longe: a abertura do Heart of Darkness já diz tudo. é o apelo do mar e o desejo de terra.

e aqui está. estender a mão gentilmente mas baixando a cortina.

#featherwithwords

starting my own tag, yay. sweet dreams are made of this.

light

"Before my birth there was infinite time, and after my death, inexhaustible time. I never thought of it before: I'd been living luminously between two eternities of darkness."
Pamuk
"We live in the flicker."
Conrad

'twixt land and sea'

 Estoril ve Cascais arasında. Karada ve denizde arasında.

(...) "I saw the straight line of the flat shore joined to the stable sea, edge to edge, with a perfect and unmarked closeness, in one leveled floor half brown, half blue under the enormous dome of the sky.", Conrad in The Secret Sharer.

(Arkadaşım, fotoğrafları çok iyi görünüyorsun.)

"A man that is born falls into a dream like a man who falls into the sea."

a frase de Conrad é das que mais gosto, é tão completa como um caleidoscópio, é mais real aos sentidos do que o anúncio da água das pedras. a memória de mergulhar dentro de água é poderosa e está num local estranho dentro do passado. tudo o que Lowry escreve cabe nesta citação, a sua vida.

"You'll never know how disappointed I was not to find any whalers in New Bedford." também lá estive e procurei o mesmo, encontrei só a casa do futebol clube do porto, sumol e pastéis de nata. o mar e a literatura, uma relação antiquíssima.

não fosse um fio tão fino, estaria disposta a seguir a maré.

- -


Joseph Conrad, um poema de Malcolm Lowry

This wrestling, as of seamen with a storm
Which flies to leeward—while they, united
In that chaos, turn, each on his nighted
Bunk, to dream of chaos again, or home—
The poet himself, struggling with the form
Of his coiled work, knows ; having requited
Sea-weariness with purpose, invited
What derricks of the soul plunge in his room.
Yet some mariner's ferment in his blood
—Though truant heart will hear the iron travail
And song of ships that ride their easting down—
Sustains him to subdue or be subdued.
In sleep all night he grapples with a sail !
But words beyond the life of ships dream on.

- -

'a chama do coração'

em pausa dos maneirismos do inútil e encostado Fabrizio del Dongo que já não suportava.

"Até então não me tinha apercebido de que era um homem na verdadeira acepção da palavra. Recordo os rostos exaustos, as figuras abatidas dos meus dois homens, e recordo a minha juventude  e uma sensação que nunca mais tive - a sensação de que viveria para sempre, que sobreviveria ao mar, à terra e a todos os homens, a sensação enganosa que nos conduz a alegrias, a perigos, ao amor, ao esforço inútil - à morte; a triunfante convicção de pujança, o calor da vida numa mão cheia de pó, a chama do coração que ano após ano se esvai, esfria, encolhe e se extingue - e extingue-se demasiado cedo, tão cedo - antes da própria vida.

E é assim que vejo o Oriente."

[acreditar em qualquer coisa, como eu dizia antes. e esta visão do Oriente (orientalismo) que contraponho à do novo mundo tão visível nos capas de Lucky Luke a caminhar em direcção ao sol que se põe, um caminho oposto e que vi abrir-se depois de Black Book]

retomando:

"E é assim que vejo o Oriente. Pude observar os seus lugares secretos e contemplar-lhe a alma; agora vejo-o sempre a partir de um pequeno bote, um imenso contorno de montanhas, de manhã, azul e longínquo; ao meio-dia, névoa ténue; parede púrpura recortada ao pôr-do-sol. Tenho a sensação de ter na mão um remo e nos olhos o vislumbre de um mar abrasadoramente azul. E vejo uma baía, uma baía ampla, lisa como vidro e polida como gelo, brilhando na escuridão. Afogueia-se ao longe uma luz vermelha por entre a escuridão da terra, e a noite está quente e suave. Estiramos os remos com braços doridos, e, subitamente, solta-se da noite tranquila uma lufada de vento, uma ténue e tépida lufada carregada de estranhos aromas a flores, a madeira perfumada - o primeiro suspiro do Oriente contra o meu rosto. Jamais o esquecerei. Foi impalpável e dominador como um sortilégio, como o segredar de uma promessa de prazer envolta em mistério."
Conrad em Juventude.

novamente a promessa. várias vezes são referidos os navegadores antigos que rumaram ao Oriente, com eles se identifica este narrador que conta a sua juventude. assim posso repetir: "porque penso que lá teria felicidade: por existir espaço de esperança."

a cena matinal, os nativos a olharem os náufragos que dormem nos botes é uma autêntica e enorme pintura, pelas cores e pela imobilidade, pelo silêncio. ("E depois vi os homens do Oriente... a olharem para mim.")

há uma senhora em Cascais que me vem à cabeça neste conto: chama-se Margarida Alberty.

epitáfio

"Era um velhote manhoso... oxalá o mar-alto onde agora repousa o embale suavemente, o embale ternamente para todo o sempre!"
Conrad em "Juventude".


aqui no original, decerto um dos melhores contos que já li, ou pelo menos um dos que mais gostei de ler.

todas as dúvidas podem ser resolvidas com um pouco de

Conrad.

(sobre esta tradução não posso dizer nada, pois que não a estou a ler, mas a versão portuguesa está muito boa, da Quasi, Bárbara Pinto Coelho)

"Todos havíamos começado a vida na marinha mercante. E entre nós cinco vingava a camaradagem deste mester e uma forte ligação ao mar, que regatas, cruzeiros e quejandos não sabem nutrir, dado que nestes apenas se frui a vida ao passo que as outras são a própria vida."
Conrad em Juventude.

- -
a porteira no seu prédio, um comandante em seu navio.

"Que mais podíamos esperar? Aquele navio velho estava cansado. Era tão jovem como sou agora, como são vocês, meus camaradas, a quem conto esta aventura. E que bom amigo teceria comentários acerca da vossa provecta idade e cansaço? Éramos incapazes de o fazer. Para nós, à ré, era como se nele tivéssemos vindo ao mundo e sido criados, como se ali vivêssemos há uma eternidade, como se não conhecêssemos outro navio. Mais depressa insultaria a velha igreja da minha aldeia por nunca ter chegado a catedral!"

os russos nunca gostaram dos polacos

e vice-versa. “I cannot abide Conrad’s souvenir shop style and bottled ships and shell necklaces of romanticist clichés.”, disse Nabokov de Conrad.

Notes on Life and Letters

para ler, Joseph Conrad.

"Much good paper has been lamentably wasted to prove that science has destroyed, that it is destroying, or, some day, may destroy poetry. Meantime, unblushing, unseen, and often unheard, the guileless poets have gone on singing in a sweet strain. How they dare do the impossible and virtually forbidden thing is a cause for wonder but not for legislation. Not yet. We are at present too busy reforming the silent burglar and planning concerts to soothe the savage breast of the yelling hooligan. As somebody — perhaps a publisher — said lately: “Poetry is of no account now-a-days.”
no capítulo "The Ascending Effort".

por falar em Conrad: tudo isto está online.

leading

o pessoal que anda a frequentar cursos de plástico de leadership e não-sei-quê devia ouvir as histórias dos velhos comandantes da marinha mercante. ou ler Conrad. é quase a mesma coisa.

[unrelatedly. preciso de um caderno sem linhas]

the horror

Last line, first paragraph, p. 87 [i.e. 285]: I seemed to hear the whispered cry "Oh! the horror!" Pencil manuscript, with corrections, of Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness, circa 1890. See the all 210 pages: aqui.

que tirei da página facebookiana da Beinecke Rare Book and Manuscript Library, da Universidade de Yale.

vocabgrabber

vocabgrabbed algumas palavras de Heart of Darkness:
accurse hippo pilgrim steamboat amaze begrime snag ivory tenebrous upcountry rivet pug-nose manager helmsman commingle steam whistle station wilderness blank space shutter smash-up startle trade secret gingery riverside by hook or by crook sandpit pyjama tidal current bush river steamer there squirting screech steam pipe hand clapping greyness bewilder brooding see chap look drop shot fascinate sway splash around out immensity secretarial prevaricator supernatural being exasperate man sombreness sombre thieve gaberdine half-caste not trade good boiler intersperse like very lank nigger satiate savage frontal bone youthfully mumble whited sepulchre stillness rubbishy eldorado fusillade elephant-tusk teakwood say annoy shamefully pitiless all unappetizing muffle glance holy terror stretcher shoe lace overheat crawl offish impenetrable upkeep ship biscuit get stave in clear out but caliper knitter lightless squirt bank contemptibly inappreciable earth forest mess about suddenly pacifically devil lot know penetrable stroll inconceivable pinhead some said come black serviette imagine unsound particularized thumbed thing too look at glitter evanescence one laze white malevolently clinking talk brood though dismantle grass wistfulness spanner restraint rolling wave head amazing inscrutable silence iron collar and so on dominoes steam cipher martini fog seem so to speak pulsate patch abreast farcical murmur vanish white man fairway vivaciously voice darkness yellow metal over contorted make vibrate bon voyage waggle fiendishly twig seaman hear deck sprit ominous appall mud back circumvent creepy imposter pilot modulate absurd singleness then sealing culminate thunderstruck discompose shrillness eye vanished breastbone piece of writing fringed peaked glamour allude eyes overfed nightmare uncoiled satiated confounded rustle out of mistily come upon confound saw impalpable grunt gloom like mad immutability come out alienist mica the least bit contort made gesticulate time clink splendidly stream about crestfallen think superciliousness imbecile sailmaker he-goat rush out droning savagery heard vermouth screeching fecund unexciting dance of death fire up scathing recrudescence acute angle shore jabber sunken waist-deep plumpness bewitched leaky varnished blindfolded abominate confab leading question fellow hovel appal unearthly immobility papier-mache tusk foot architecturally untitled nothing unnerve mystery outwards just columnar disparagingly mumbling sedentary shuffle knitting aspect trading Swede in the air lash together joviality want drape real presence lift half-pint long burst coast air fool splashing little kind of harlequin primeval v-shaped fossil stick throttling no end mournful rinsing repose on trade virgin forest off wanted jungle headman empty breath of fresh air ebbing air out twill tin ripple fisticuffs below cocksure profound sometimes sheer forepart leave lying wheel watchfully bottom out shadow accountant vigilantly clear immense assagai slowly looking glittering kind of course sepulchral splay yell pestiferous pole stack idea askew nowhere keep flabby before horror-struck right stonily food for thought shake steer things hut Jove obsequiously stool bite face Sir Francis Drake somnambulist spear bulge steamed lost leaning every week heavy enough more carve out doorway by and by sneak off wool enthralling tree appalling paddler whizz a lot devilry dark pensive down bony hullabaloo truckle unexpectedness sea beguile take stand men near beastly featureless propitiatory uncomplicated blinding whisper aggravate eloquence shook ratchet homeward-bound denominate bit muddle concertina left contaminate somebody behind bury uphill domino appear dishonour wood shaved dark-green draped scuffle going ashore hillside away newspaper article luminous depth thought stuck unexpressed lager insoluble dead continuously resemble shamefacedly smelly drone a bit hang rimmed surprise legal proceeding even beguiled adversely sound dismantled trireme glide afar nose rudimentary indefinable fantastic diabolic mean baffle agent lose undersized waiting fly deplorable civilize darkly unostentatious row alpaca preeminently fireman desolation burst out somewhere day remember shoe stick to rag on that point deathlike matted arm sunshine tremor much light hide out after cautiously illuminate frightful leg still mutter exactly going and then hammock fringe creek lean course rotten winding-sheet nostril beads dugout pronounce uncoil bristly yokel despondently leap jingle trustworthiness blindfold a little lunatic whacked assegai rest phantom reverberate believe legs round smoke rotting only ponderously untrammelled enlarge moment unconcerned ashore exasperating stare Francis Drake unwholesome mangy uneasiness overboard diaphanous water languidly splash double door at last hole gauzy suppose in the bargain ask ulster bewitch jocose undergrowth the devil gabble irresolutely incomprehensible mysterious rhythmically stacked under way good clamour dark blue crawling unrecognizable surf philanthropic tell starch flicker oily tumble-down other gourd disinter sordid two begrimed gliding stanchion try clap interrupt great get on with thereabouts being elbow alone last throttle three-legged afterwards big hand perhaps bulging again quiet incredible cutter intruder disfavour misty run first-class rifle weirdly feebly feel mad wrapper confoundedly shed footsore penetrate too much whistle gifted speck mingle dumfounded fidget while lookout carrier helmeted grimness lie shape expression dream boding halter hate knit shout parasol invade waterside inconceivably candle dazzle stay-at-home phrase incantation meaning luckily end poor devil menace cry statuesque shackled madhouse looking at wait intolerable doze off fixed star obtrude any stamp shoulder blade through taint ecstatically enigma inquire flipper grimy gone discomposed string sniff mess after all intrust pretence reverberating within sick morbidly soundless at rest well lug faint you said it noise white line terror trading post factitious not surprised glaring stand still unstained piloting slim pompously tearing down drubbing soul give begin unsteady flatness month consume twitch high-strung tumble mangle look away edge rib get out hopeless bottom ship flies placidity thump stopped stop last gasp annoyed torchlight bend moustache peddle biting blind commonplace cartridge pencilled solitude detonation forget confuse felt turn up kinship butcher far such spectacled howl billowy military post crawl in wink dusk sulky gape lifted must introduce fancy glinting night inextricable yarn interrupted fright improvise bead on that monstrous become illuminating go out flying flame deciphered recondite high uproar waterway can altogether stakes laid low dark-blue blank stick out doorstep sun hands turn for good sententiously somehow Thames recline plank get the better of cannibal unresponsive tawny high-handed toying gift inquiring satanic backbone tobacco blurred brilliance rinse awash come to invoke deafened eyelid watch no more land volubility understand duffer curious lots let loose deep demoralization wooded approach wild-eyed futile house hint life seal serried stir suavely steering think of unshaven low once now and then why edge in excessive breathe in lean against revile jerk caravan entangle fierce tone facts of life cliff never post hulk uninterrupted thoughtlessly carve bends abscond shoulder overheated red monotonous heartache startling glare drum word peroration lazily partnership clearing calico along work human indistinct bronze lamentable inshore onslaught silly adorer arrow aware drollery straight unavoidable bear off yawl positively ruined exalted mile rotund buried anchor brass charmed go on pitiful charm altruistic initiation storeroom collar gleam slightly glint patching drub out of sight chain paunch pendent short unreal binoculars fore slipper self-seeking cup of tea forbearing glass innumerable sink vegetation scrutinize varnish senile above aggravated modulated general manager sick person move Inferno magnificent sky notion perfectly yet trouble inadmissible in the least sight greyish reach kick disconsolately exhale fatalism hind first sweep off unbuttoned glimpse purpose atrocious body moribund donkey outlast half hunger tearfully shoes simple weird greasy envelop hindering irretrievably adieu uncivil funnel Mephistopheles glisten profundity inexorable come over articulated legionary woods path sit jolly condense illegible interloper compassionate flash vanishing rot unswerving everlastingly pestilential flop loafing ahead hair inhuman motionless whole open uncongenial beckon affirm hankering invasion pair clapping bizarre truth keep guard fence dangle cross-legged open letter appalled button up sunlight caper deuce live cleared unbounded till movement emissary really inconclusive talk about side wraith every keep on congregate uneasy mime beardless edify fall flat danger either sort tearing place sluggish no doubt warlike smile start cranium interminable beat furry sit up fend off heartiness projected confidential intolerably outbreak nearly informed nod get on run on three red-eye groan hissing at once forefinger wretched jacket moonlight sleep heavens done roll roam deadened struggle cotton farther tuck decent on the road flat steaming unavoidably indistinctly cloth influential stave annoying becalmed stretch carcass seamanship come in shouted mizzen camp here filch speak abject hairdresser trader remain hurry big tree couch buzz knob tear turned exalt unapproachable all day long manage underfoot brute aspiration extravagant supernatural discolour educate find on board lugubrious lower jaw becalm unspeakable ebb dilate trenchant searchingly skulking fluke casual swindle broad startlingly figuratively toil behave cuff piece now glance over bother cripple toga warning desire and so kept encouragingly clenched fist hummock roof knock over remarkable massacre glow memory overtaking menacing ornamental bone sprouting inform old fitfully finish off middle subdue belief fill write thieving mute fire fabulous patiently drowsiness quick broadening pug each all over peeling canoe disappear bloodshot shudder hooked serenity aft flow out clammy strength make out correct unreasonably chattering evanescent doubt scow regrets languid devote sleeping tingle together ruled pigeon glistening worrying peddling Russian fumed unbutton map expect outrageous caste litany doze inexcusable inspire voracious writhe cheery tepid strike ever horror take aim catacomb look like slip by precarious closed go up inexplicable spread over embrace knot intrepidity worry throw limb blaze fall wild snake avid filled enveloping unnerved wrenching beetle formless tremulously desolate august deaf stride pent-up haul regularity round table decipher frown trying earnestly dart keeping hobble anxious funk eatable amazed least yes step root out mind ordered symbolic gloomy mat legging in front die formality hill jetty bight bye swerve rapacity gatherer mend rehearse lodge in curtain gang death assuring hesitating unscathed inside pierce fluently inborn vengeful blackness company mostly sham heart tatter wonder all at once swiftly sock surroundings extraordinary heap sixty blue sounding eyeglass avenge verily casually stitched disclose tragically push on bearer topple readable brusque continent destiny pipe strings blur strip pause current unexplored slope village circuitous stand up penny North Pole overpower desperation abominable confusedly give up reality go to pieces second-rate sense audacity muffled colossal hardihood to and fro unexpected shrunken greedy pail frontal enthral simply dissolve rush hippopotamus break of day shade let off exchanged shoulder in gesticulating precipitately Fleet Street rigid colourless lustre brick sweep peep hesitate all the time promptitude audible swept rascally mangrove rapacious shock wart loads sorrow lose it murmuring moonshine bearing go wrong reclaimed hook hyena adore pronounced pile up as it were complexion full getting bereavement wanderer go off shocked crook crowd memoranda instalment beyond naked haze unalterable look on agitate transfixed shave vibration struck placid ornamentation back and forth legged next wandering shine existence sailor declivity distance gauge show set about gran enthusiastic English evidently enthrall invite climate unfathomable perceive notice rails hanker astir muff surprised mercilessly matter opened ruin grin upper hand progress utterance impossible overhang unconnected torn small vague offing whitish connect disgust charge wantonly dine in just as own dumb clerk wreck lay hands on legality infliction entrails anticipate estuary delay all right besides dissipate sigh tore hidden provoke intention ringlet lose sight of slime efface crossing apparition magpie carry pile babble image front kick up past assured loose starvation drown motive sign edifying adored colour coming the Hill hen sudden clumsily jerking fiendish wedged extremity silent talking swift telegraphic indestructible assure break contaminated here and there destitution enclosure Europe fend wade point cabin good-bye take to quarrelsome in some way squat smash knowledge expected seduce name method boyish cat semicircle bottomed slimy in that soothing go to imbecility moved greased dictation people reason compose bloodthirsty wear lanky contempt arguing in this infernal unruffled appearance sorrowful agitation concentrate put together switching snap earring strange listen spectral another flow urge ability yard detest prop up reproachful get hold of find out dim rein in shoal fleshy lip bare East Coast rail narrate bundle excitable close fascinated meditative threadbare riot obliquely pretending handle go far folly shackle jab of a sudden deficiency repose intended slip swing pate fallen hungry sensation oiled mere hide sun rose intense civilly devotion get hold wake whispered irritation may aimlessly crested careless astound embalm the absurd inviting sunlit electrify brushed exceptional explore greatness making ear vast grotesque breathe hollow self-defence transfix listlessly found absolutely judge breath yelled earthy blade apparently living same redeeming insipid anyhow essence utter firewood eyed illustrative edging arrive clatter quart thrall waist tie up teeth lighted subtle hold understandable thickened heralded noxious on earth running growl finger improving board wall tied expansive neck noticed care bad pathetically opaque corrected policeman patience extreme disdainful skulk plenty fascination several more than foolish paddle get worse jeopardy ablaze fever shelling lingering fine space bones raid for a while wander worried attitude perceived days fact shake hands ominously terrible bent uniform Sahara ajar rioting make a point happen jib spotted tackle pass out treacherous haul up elicited sinister morose pen up arise wide feverishly at all blow hugging miserable in due course bear emotion digression stern declaim sentiment will eyeball pamper perdition artfully appeal tidal railway unpardonable excellently attack ostentation confidentially rolled hug packet approaching shadowy lustrous by the way absurdity improve set eerie sights organist also live in ending recover glasses unrestrained look into woolly affair monologue pronouncement secrecy longing convulsively impromptu quite weakness tried carbine soothingly rumour indisputable the Flood scientifically sum up necktie hours calm ascendancy sort of get back walk dance ghastly almost very well spot horn irritate dissolving look after rattle every bit forked period of time get it struggling upper witch chin scoundrel blasting warn mask various prying athwart from the heart festoon trickle noisily prop nephew true quickening out of the way biscuit atmosphere marsh uncontrollable pretty puzzle barbarous ignore rim impressively salvage dear stuff channel pay out stupid science young raise ravine used to glorious wrestle be on at work spectacles scare periodically back down grove knock on straighten complete whispering arms nicety sleepy enlarged tooth dazzling criminal sociable die out ornament however faultless door capacity lay tan awful bode murky cravat loop end of the world envy petrify own right trunks background thicket bared hour native thumping scepticism gauntlet solid grave get into collapse lead steadiness thin wire overcast prehistoric Indian Ocean head up most twitching waking on the spot letters bald breast imperceptible serene put unceasing deaden meddling belong white-haired personify speech callous gripping unexpectedly jig tug woolen awake curving initiate whiff drop frenzy fold fired spree cheek prudently thrown loins gash stammer forerunner change affirmation faithfulness around mist contentedly remark come up thick inefficient awning annoyance lightning knee restrain painfully ant horned higher up shaped touch grip world talk of vantage deadly first moment unforeseen knitted long time yellow stifle eject superb downhill fascinating wink at shoot rapid tread on disease languor brotherly despondency instantly on it reputation wallow feeling faced inland little finger inestimable errant secret awfully redeem staring tanned soon get up argue run away do up difficult float harmless the right way amuse belong to evoke disclaim cookery equitable chief starred greenish distaste instruct digging fretted occur note futility creeper stealthy dry uttermost startled navigation disappointment hated papers gloriously words avenged think out tail seaward fateful pretend insidious cropped missed bow down plastered eyebrow acutely out to brutally surrounded maybe recess connected appropriately festive Ravenna improvised sign on lump custom beating smartly nautical sorcerer candour overwhelm whack glazed skin widower withering building intend buccaneer deceitful wisp clothes peak asking ward off incalculable cause tumult everlasting matter-of-fact gentlemanly tropics littered proceeding leaf buttoned dependency lotus dummy do in linger hurriedly dying year unmistakably chaff welcoming scrawl East India fragment drainage emptiness pent scar have a look very much like pulse endanger cut be full ignored belated many laughing forthwith rested done for fat despair few troupe tiptoe childish deserted wonderfully bring stacks knotted surround walk off skinny lofty wake up muscle misunderstand stake queer narrow pink shuffling curt pervade evening send rolling worsted tainted confidence unstable midst at least overwhelming or so side by side hope Mars exuberant accident sustenance vacant woman take a look repulse curtly listener writing devastation projectile irresistibly tear off beat in hind leg deepen centre hiss wisdom paid rather sealed tentative human being transgression becoming take note deliberate shadowed

Bartleby's Blank Wall

numa edição da Penguin, os 60's, que me arrependo de não ter comprado inteira na altura, são 48 páginas de Bartleby. quem passa por aqui não esquece nunca. o modo é normalmente uma reviravolta final e inesperada como as narrativas fantásticas de Poe. na forma semelhantes, esqueleto e decoração afinal, mas Melville sempre em perseguição da sua baleia branca, o inexplicável lado sombra humano. inexplicável de várias formas. se sempre lá esteve, se é impresso depois como em Billy Budd. o que nos faz andar, um passo por isto, outro passo por outra coisa. o Estrangeiro matou o árabe por coisa nenhuma, como se continuam agora a matar árabes por coisa nenhuma. o escriturário não encontrou no mar uma saída, um horror em branco, sem sequer as palavras de Kurtz, mas I would prefer not to-

o texto estava aqui.

vermelho

no (meu) dia do cansaço.

"The evening was delightfully calm. He was sitting apart and alone, and wishing himself somewhere else—on board the schooner for choice, with the dinner-harness off. He hadn’t exchanged forty words altogether during the evening with the other guests. He saw her suddenly all by herself coming towards him along the dimly lighted terrace, quite from a distance.

She was tall and supple, carrying nobly on her straight body a head of a character which to him appeared peculiar, something—well—pagan, crowned with a great wealth of hair. He had been about to rise, but her decided approach caused him to remain on the seat. He had not looked much at her that evening. He had not that freedom of gaze acquired by the habit of society and the frequent meetings with strangers. It was not shyness, but the reserve of a man not used to the world and to the practice of covert staring, with careless curiosity. All he had captured by his first, keen, instantly lowered, glance was the impression that her hair was magnificently red and her eyes very black. It was a troubling effect, but it had been evanescent; he had forgotten it almost till very unexpectedly he saw her coming down the terrace slow and eager, as if she were restraining herself, and with a rhythmic upward undulation of her whole figure. The light from an open window fell across her path, and suddenly all that mass of arranged hair appeared incandescent, chiselled and fluid, with the daring suggestion of a helmet of burnished copper and the flowing lines of molten metal. It kindled in him an astonished admiration. But he said nothing of it to his friend the Editor. Neither did he tell him that her approach woke up in his brain the image of love’s infinite grace and the sense of the inexhaustible joy that lives in beauty. No! What he imparted to the Editor were no emotions, but mere facts conveyed in a deliberate voice and in uninspired words.

“That young lady came and sat down by me. She said: ‘Are you French, Mr. Renouard?’”

Conrad em Within the Tides

daqui.